A Real Life Homer Simpson Moment

In the Simpson’s episode Lisa Gets an "A" (thanks MM) we find the family on their way home from church and having the following verbal exchange.

Bart: Oh, I'm starving! Mom, can we go Catholic so we can get communion wafers and booze?
Marge: No, no one's going Catholic. Three children IS enough, thank you.

Homer tells his son to hang on, because the family is going out for "our traditional Sunday brunch." He swerves off the freeway to the on-ramp to "Eatie Gourmet's" grocery store. Brunch, as it turns out, is the supermarket's free-sample smorgasbord.

Homer: [grabbing some free samples from an employee's tray] Brunch is served!
Marge: I feel guilty coming here every Sunday and never actually buying anything.
Homer: Why? We're following the rules. [eats more samples] If it has a toothpick in it, it's free! [Homer sticks a toothpick into a huge steak and takes a bite from it, then punches a hole in a can of beer and catches the spray in his mouth]

I had a similar moment today at lunch. I went over the Reston Center to the Harris Teeter grocery store. Homer Simpson and I love this grocery store and I wish we had one in Ellicott City for one reason; all of the delicious food with toothpicks stuck in it. Yes, folks 80% of my lunch today was absolutely free and it was oh so delicious. I sampled three kinds of gourmet breads, three different kinds of spread, and cheeses from Greece, Switzerland and Spain. I ate smoked imported turkey breast and fresh pineapple slices dripping with sweet sweet juice, and for desert there was cheery cheese cake and a lemon cookie! Unlike Homer I did not stick a toothpick in anything that didn’t already have one in it. Hence I did not have a steak or a beer. Something to drink would have been nice as Teeter does have such a huge collection of wines it was a shame there was no wine tasting today, but what are you gonna do.

PS, I did buy some fresh made sushi for $7.00.