Hugs for Sale! OR... Franchising Affection

I am upstairs this morning getting ready for work. Jenne is downstairs getting her lunch ready. I hear the muffled sounds of the talking heads on the morning news program. Good Morning America or some such show. I think I hear the word “cuddle” and some giggling from the co-talking head. Jenne calls upstairs.
“Honey you’ll never guess what the big news story is this morning!”
I think hopefully to myself that George Bush either resigned the presidency or has finally been declared mentally incompetent and ineligible to run in November. We couldn't be that fortunate and I don't even voice it.
“So if I’ll never guess just tell me.”
“Cuddle parties! They are talking about people throwing parties just to cuddle with each other,” she calls back. “And they charge $20-$30 admission fee to these parties!”

At this moment our cat Poe bounces into the bedroom and rubs against my legs. I guess hearing the word cuddle reminded him that it’s time for his ‘cuddle.' What I call ‘the Big Rub.' I'm all for cuddling and affection and hugs and back rubs, etc. I’m thinking why are people paying money to cuddle and who are they cuddling with that they have to pay for it. I keep waiting to hear something about the drug Ecstasy thrown in, but I don’t. That's a good thing. It's also time to also maintain that open mind that I am so proud to proclaim I have and not try and jump to conclusions. Hmm there's an idea for a product... a jump to conclusions matt. I digress.
“I’ll be right down,” I call back as I pull on my pants and tuck in my shirt. By the time I get down stairs I am too late for the main story and I only catch the talking heads cracking jokes and giggling again about the idea of a cuddle party. Jenne is eager to give me some of the details.
“People are cuddling with complete strangers at cuddle parties in Manhattan and they pay an admission fee. It has something to do with the alienation caused by urban living. People having a need to be held and hugged in non-threatening, non-sexual environment,” she expounds.
I walk over give her a free hug and a free good morning kiss.
“Hmmm... really? Typically that's what friends, lovers and family are for?” I reply as I head to the kitchen to pour a bowl of Lucky Charms. They are after all magically delicious. "Maybe these folks don't have that?"
I really don’t know what to make of this top news story. I am, however actually glad that it is a top news story even though it sounds a tad absurd and so "southern Californian." Just the thing those "girly men" would launch. However it really is nice to hear a story about people looking for a little affection and togetherness instead of blowing people up. Although a little sad in a way too because people ARE paying $30 bucks for three hours of cuddling. This is something we should all get for free. I file this tidbit of news in my big melon of head for later thought and research. Jenne and I finish our morning routine and head out the door to an appointment with my lawyer. The meeting with the lawyer about my accident goes well and Jenne and I head to our respective jobs. As I drive the circle of death – AKA the Capital Beltway – the concept of “cuddle party” runs through my head. It’s a much more entertaining subject to think about then the SUV driving ass-clown tailgating me. I decide to just let my thoughts run whatever wild course they will.
So it started in New York City and I am just a tad surprised. California would have been my first guess. However, New Yorkers are among the most neurotic people in the world. The city forces them to be that way. I mean look at Woody Allen. That guy turned neuroticism into an art form and he made movies about it. And there is the whole September 11 diaster and I am sure people are still trying to deal with that. I have a lot of preconceived notions running through my head and I admit that most of them lead me to think that “cuddle party” is a precursor or catalyst – I am going for big words today – for orgy. But if it was an euphamism for orgy the news would be screaming about it. So I push the orgy thoughts down and shift my thoughts. I see a room of mostly strangers standing around like wall flowers. All of the straight guys and lesbians in the room want to cuddle with the hot woman with the firm supple breasts. The gay guys hone in on the cute guys who all happen to be straight and homophobic, and the bisexuals... well they just want to cuddle with everyone! The straight folks look like teenagers at their first dance. All standing against the wall. The hippy-like moderator talks about “feeling the energy and the love” and “getting in touch with each other” and yet telling the cuddlers that they can’t feel each other in a sexual way. What about “nature’s thumbs up” – AKA the uncontrollable erection? You know it’s going to happen and the cuddlers are wearing pajamas! You can’t hide that kind of thing in PJs or sweat pants. No sirrie Bob! BOING and Mr. Happy is standing at attention in the PJs. There’s hygiene to think about too. I certainly hope the folks who don’t know the meaning of shower and deodorant are kicked out. Oh and are these parties after traditional meal times? What if one of the party goers had Taco Bell for lunch? Taco Bell usually turns into taco smell an hour or so latter. Refried beans anyone? Then there’s the idea that these guys are charging people for this. Come on in; open your arms and your wallet. It initially strikes me as a sad statement on city living, society and culture when people have to pay for affection and they have reached a point where they do so with complete strangers. Well they are strangers at the first party they attend and maybe they are good friends afterwards. That's a plus. Then you can cuddle with them for free in your own place, or do the party goers become party regulars and continue to pay thirty bucks for cuddles? YIKES! Keep an open mind, open mind, open mind and remember that I said I have preconceived notions. So after many miles of thinking about this - and yes sitting in traffic gives me the time to think about this – I decide that I really don’t know jack about this latest new age trend, the rules/regulations, and if there’s some kind of licensing or insurance needed. I need real info. I figure when I get to work I’ll do a Google search and look up what all the hub-bub is about bub. An hour later I do just that and I post the links below for your enlightenment. One of the things that I found most interesting is that the folks that came up with this idea have trade marked the name “Cuddle Party” and are working to spread this concept to London, Milwaukee and other cities. They are franchising affection! I guess that I am just among the lucky people of the world. Jenne and I cuddle, we are affectionate with our friends and they with us, all non-sexual of course. Hugs are freely given and casual touches are welcome. If Jenne and I ever wanted to hold a party where people cuddle (no sex... we're affectionate, but we aren't swingers) we would do so and we’d only charge $15.00 a person. LOL! Bring a friend at half price. First hug is free, pricing for spooning is negotiable. Now there's a bargain.

Explore the phenomenon at these links!
AZ Central.Com
OnMilwaukee.Com
Cuddle Party.Com

Maybe I need to go into the affection business... non-sexual of course. I have always been a very affectionate person, I am a super people person and an extravert. It does sound like a good career for me and it would give me loads of time for my photography.

Please note, I am NOT making fun of the cuddle monsters (yes, that is what they call themselves), as I love cuddling... a lot. I just don't call myself a cuddle monster. Now how does our calendar look for scheduling our own party? Hmm....?